Did I Make The Right Decision?
by Mr. Oliver Queen
Summary: I decided to go after Killbane. Was this the right choice?. No. Not at all. I lost her and its my fault. One shot based off of bad ending. Tinking about continuing


AN: First Saints Row fix. One shot, might continue based on response. This takes place after the bad ending.

Disclaimer: I own nothing

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Was it the right choice? I don't know. At the time, the adrenaline was pushing me and my thirst for revenge was not yet quenched. But hearing those words come from that STAG bitch's mouth pissed me off. They destroyed a monument with my friends, with the woman I loved on it.

It was always her. After every one night stand and quick hookup it always came back to her. And with good reason. She was beautiful, smart, and she was someone I could always confide in. It always came back to her.

Everyone took Johnny's death pretty hard. Hell, I even cried. He was my best friend. He always had my back when I needed someone to raise hell with. But she took it the hardest. It's understandable, she looked up to Johnny. I even heard once that she had a thing for Johnny. They both squashed those rumors though. She looked up to him as a brother, and Johnny was still stricken by Aisha's death.

Even after I started a relationship with Viola, she held her reservations out of respect to me. I'll admit it. The relationship with Viola was meaningless. It was just sex, but at the time I just needed someone to help me through all the shit. I distinctly remember a conversation I had with Viola.

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"Do you love her?" I saw the tears start to form in her eyes.

"I uh, yeah I do," I could see she was upset, but I was surprised that she wasn't yelling at me. "I'm sorry Viola. I didn't mean to string you alonmg like this."

"No. It's fine. It's just, that with my sister gone, I'm alone in this world." She was sobbing now. This was a regular thing. She would always cry herself to sleep.

"Viola. You're not alone. Me and the rest of the Saints are here for you." I did my best to console her.

"Go. Go on. I really do hope you find some happiness with her." That was the last time I ever spoke to her.

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After that, I made it a goal to win her affections. I wasn't really that hard though. All I had to do was help her take out some of those Morningstar fucks, and she was golden.

Everything about her was perfect. She was the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She was also one of the smartest, besides Kinzie. I remember when she helped me hack into the Stilwater PD computers to find the location of The General. And honesty, her ice queen personality turned me on. She was no nonsense, and it was one of the most attractive qualities.

She was also one of most trusted lieutenants. Sure I had Pierce, but who wants to listen to him bitch 24/7? She helped coordinate many attacks against the Sons and the Morningstar.

It always came back to her. Back in Stilwater, I was I with some girl, can't remember her name. But we were going good, as good as a relationship with the leader of the most powerful gang in the city can go, and one night, I found myself in Purgatory with Shaundi and Pierce getting high, when she walked in and started blaming me for cheating on her. It was crazy, I was just hittin the bong with my friends, and her comes Ms. Whatshername on a war path! There was truth to her accusations though. A couple weeks before, I started sleeping with Shaundi. There was just a strong physical attraction there, also an emotional one. We both grew up not knowing our parents, and we both just needed someone for comfort. Lord knows I wasn't finding it with Whatshername.

Shaundi was the only one who knew. I actually was smarter than I let on. I went to college and got a masters degree in Federal Law. But when i graduated, I couldn't get a job. What's the point of a masters degree, if I can't get a job? The night I got turned down by yet another law firm that wasn't looking to hire, was when I almost was killed during a gang turf battle.

I had a blinding pain in my chest. It wasn't from a physical injury, but from an emotional one. I just let the woman, the only woman, I ever loved, die. Just for something as simplistic as revenge. My victory, or whatever you'd call it, was bittersweet.

"Boss is it done?" Pierce asked when I picked up the phone and answered. I was stading near the corpse of my fallen enemy pondering my decision.

"Yeah. It's, uh, it's done." There was a pang of guilt running through my body.

"Was it worth it?" Were his final words before I ended the call.

I sat there wallowing in victory, but at what cost? Losing the only woman I cared about? It was a hallow victory that carried no meaning if I couldn't celebrate it with Shaundi. I decided to head to the Broken Shillelagh, to celebrate my quote unquote, victory against Killbane. And to announce my retirement.

Nothing can ever prepare you for losing the ones you hold dearest. All you can hope to do is move forward, and continue their legacy.

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AN: This was much longer, but the other stuff didn't fit too well into the general story, so I cut it out. Hope you enjoyed this one shot. There will be more saints row ficsnim the future!


End file.
